10 Months Sober and My Birthday. Damn.

Okay, so here we are - it's May 1st. This is significant because it's my birthday. Yay for me! I'm older now. I might get some frozen yogurt later to celebrate.

Today also marks my 10 months sober. This is my first sober birthday and NONE of my friends have called. Why? Because they're really uncomfortable. How does one party whilst sober? If you ask my friends, the answer is YOU DON'T! Me? I would suggest nachos and Eddie Izzard's Dress to Kill.

So, happy freakin' birthday to me. Honestly, I would rather not see them. They're all so understanding without understanding a damn thing. I mean, how's one drink going to hurt? Or one night of drinking? Man, each time I hear that I really want to buy in, to believe that I could just drink with my friends for a night. But I know that once that happens, there will be nothing standing in the way of my alcoholic rational mind from me taking that one night to mean I'm fine so why can't I have a margarita on my own? Or a pitcher. There is no such thing as moderation.

So, what am I doing today? I'm sleeping. I plan to get naked, put aromatherapy stuff on my pillow, and climb between cool sheets. I will lock my door and put on my white noise rainstorm. If anyone tries to call, they will go directly to voicemail because I decided not to charge my cell phone.  When I wake up, I will write and it will be good.